Overqualified
“Overqualified's cover letters are like a slap in the face, but the slap is hilarious, and you can't stop laughing, and as soon as it’s over you want to tell all your friends about the slap. You know the kind?”
— Ryan North, Dinosaur Comics
“Joey Comeau’s Overqualified is Judy Blume’s Are You There God, It’s Me Margaret? as chewed up and spit out by J. G. Ballard. . . . A book whose melancholy is leavened by a surprising hilarity.“
— Paul Di Filippo, author of The Steampunk Trilogy and Cosmocopia
Cover letters are all the same. They’re useless. You write the same lies over and over again, listing the store-bought parts of yourself that you respect the least. God knows how they tell anyone apart, but this is how it's done.
And then one day a car comes out of nowhere, and suddenly everything changes and you don’t know if he’ll ever wake up. You get out of bed in the morning, and when you sit down to write another paint-by-numbers cover letter, something entirely different comes out.
You start threatening instead of begging. You tell impolite jokes. You talk about your childhood and your sexual fantasies. You sign your real name and you put yourself honestly into letter after letter and there is no way you are ever going to get this job. Not with a letter like this.
And you send it anyway.
Comments
I need this book. Gah. Forget need-- *clicks "add to cart" *
:) YAY
Nah... no rapidshare or .pdf for THIS particular book. It's distributed using this new technology - movable printed type! It's extremely convenient. You don't need to carry around a laptop or use batteries or anything!
Just buy the damn book and support the author. It's only fifteen dollars and it's not like other things that are put out there. You know what I'm talking about - the stuff put out by Activision or Stephen King that seem OK to pirate because they're already insanely rich. Joey Comeau is one half of a team that puts out a webcomic and he has some of his cover letters posted and they're hilarious. Drop the fifteen dollars for the book - it isn't that much money. I mean... I know you hate the sun and all, but I'm sure you could use a broom or something to get it inside from off your porch.
Enjoy the book.
Can someone delete this barbaric attempt at crushing an author's shot at success?
thx.
no. just buy the book if you wanna read it.
thats what im doing! =)
What the hell Simon?
Get out your credit card and live in the real world. Joey spent a lot of time and effort on this, and it's a wonderful book. And if Katie West is to be believed, the feel of the paper is half of the experience.
lol Simon troll u
and if your not trolling, goddamn, its like 15 bucks, just buy it
Overqualified started as a series on Joey Comeau and Emily Horne's site asofterworld.com
If you haven't been there you should check it out - it's free!
Well, mostly free. You pay a service provider to be online...unless you go to a library and use their computer. That's free. No wait, libraries are your tax dollars at work.
My point is, we (ecw) like it that people recognize value in the book as an art form/cultural artifact/service provider/whatever- thanks for all your comments and support!
OK I bought the book... If I don't like it I'm going to take pictures of me making fun of it!
Cheers
BTW, Thanks for all the good comics and observations leading to this purchase.
Cover letters exposed..... I bought it and it was definitely worth it. I love the dark humour and the bitter optimism. I was forced to write a cover letter while I was reading it and it made the entire experience less painful. I mean, who's out of work and sick of telling lies to pay the bills? Half the world? This is the best recession book to read because it reminds you that the job isn't the point. It's all that life and mystery and awkwardness and love.
Okie... what are the chances I will find this book in a store far far far away in Middle East(actually Qatar)?
the description of this book is how Ive been approaching online dating. it isnt all its cracked up to be.
Keeping up the tradition of #freebiefriday, today we offered a copy of Joey Comeau’s Overqualified to the person who could tweet us the best 140-character cover letter. We all had a good laugh, maybe too good...
All you clever contributors keep those handy when we get 140-character dismissal letters for spending all day on twitter.
Now some honourable mentions based on our completely subjective amusement:
Most prolific:
eugaet
Best suck-up:
Allie Riley
skinismy@ecwpress I ate my pancakes this morning thinking "Is there nothing better than J. Comeau?" the answer? ECW press. And wombats. Allie Riley
Best Connection to other ECW titles: (Read/Seen Pontypool yet?)
Jon perry
Grubbyfoot@ecwpress Dear sirs; Employ me and I can guarantee a zero-tolerance stance on the forthcoming zombie apocalypse. Also, I am enthusiastic.
Best standalone tweet:
Alex Clements
Alexrclements@ecwpress I need a job & I need it for the money. I have a dream, a dream of something magical & beautiful, but kittens & batter aren't free
But closely followed by:
Emily Toone
rhinestonewinoDear Nestle, standalone hot pockets. Your clientele would never have to put down their controller. Or get girlfriends. @ecwpress @reply
and
Christopher Carlson
boomtheearth@ecwpress Dear Employers, I majored in English, so I'm only qualified to give handjobs behind dumpsters. Please hire me. I have soft hands!
And here’s the full listing, (in reverse chronological order)
Steven
stevenae@ecwpress Dear Chiquita, I'm about to blow your mind and save your ad budget. "Bananas: they're fucking delicious and they cost 19 cents.
eugaet
eugaet@ecwpress Dear Hiring Manager: I'm standing behind you RIGHT NOW.
eugaet
eugaet@ecwpress Dear Hiring Manager: I put on my robe and wizard hat.
eugaet
eugaet@ecwpress Dear Hiring Manager: I'm in possession of several...we'll say 'holiday' photos you would find interesting. I can start Monday.
Joe
TheseDamnOceans@ecwpress I am more than willing to discuss my familiarity with the Anarchist's Cookbook and its applications in the dry cleaning industry.
eugaet
eugaet@ecwpress Dear Hiring Manager: Can you keep a secret?
Kristin McDonald
kristinmcdonald@ecwpress My future self told me I had to do whatever it takes to get this job, the fate of the world rests on it. The ball's in your court.
eugaet
eugaet@ecwpress Dear Hiring Manager: When the student is ready, the master will appear. I'll be there shortly.
mason
r4v5@ecwpress Dad didn't love you. I am comfortable helping others with Inconvenient Truths. I will be your carbon-emission reduction engineer.
emilie esders
emilieesders@ecwpress unemployed parapsychologist who can rock a jumpsuit and proton pack looking to bust some lost souls.
mason
r4v5@ecwpress I can leverage my proven experience as pinball wizard into any number of pinball-related positions. Do you need a pinball warlock?
mason
r4v5@ecwpress I found this opening by watching you every morning, following you, checking your company's job boards. References upon request.
Kristin McDonald
kristinmcdonald@ecwpress Ive talked myself out of doing amazing things. Had I not, Id be dead. It seems you pay a price to be safe. Now I want free things.
Max Jacobson
maxjacobson@ecwpress Maybe I wouldn't have dropped out of college if I'd known porn actors had to write cover letters too. I have a huge dick. Yours, x
Christopher Carlson
boomtheearth@ecwpress Dear Employers, I majored in English, so I'm only qualified to give handjobs behind dumpsters. Please hire me. I have soft hands!
Emily Toone
rhinestonewinoDear Nestle, standalone hot pockets. Your clientele would never have to put down their controller. Or get girlfriends. @ecwpress @reply
Erin K
erinlaurel8@ecwpress Hello. I am confident my condition is not contagious but am willing to telecommute. Resume attached (and fully sanitized).
.
Mariana Velázquez
arrozc0nleche@ecwpress: Dear Madame, I'm not ambitious. I have never sought to rise from any given position, but I'm very limber and open to suggestions.about 3 hours ago from web
Eric Vondran
nscafe@ecwpress I wish I was in Tijuana, eating bar-b-qued iguana, I take requests on the telephone. I am qualified for Mexican Radio
Ornithopter
ornithopter@ecwpress I don't have a degree, but 17 years of psychotherapy have given me plenty of real-world experience, and it doesn't look that hard.
Leon Arnott
webbedspace@ecwpress Hello. I will be executed on Saturday, and all my life I've wanted to be a fireman.
carina
cbradio@ecwpress I just paid $214.08 to avoid a lawsuit. I stole some shampoo to impress a girl. Not that that's your fault, but...pick me?
Timothy Swann
tetrarchangel@ecwpress @untoward Dear sir/madam, as a fan of obvious transexual jokes writing for your transexual joke book is a job I will excel at.
. Rusell Parde
ruskerdu@ecwpress @reply Dear jerks, I'm too good for this job. a smart person would fire you and hire me as your replacemnt. cant wait to meet you!
eugaet
eugaet@ecwpress Dear ECWPress Hiring Mgr: As crissy's position will soon be open, I offer my services. I don't even know what Twitter is. Promise.
Erin K
erinlaurel8@ecwpress Dear Sir: I want your job so much I'm applying publicly via Twitter while at my current job. But I will never do that to you.
Nicholas Boshart
NicBoshart@ecwpress Dear Executives; due to recent parental Madoff involvement, I'm required to find work. Skills include laissez faire and shopping.
Shaun Doiron
officertango@ecwpress To Whom It May Concern, I have long wanted a full time position in IT ever since I saw that movie Office Space.
Sarah J H
jhsarah@ecwpress SquareEnix, I am applying for FF game namer. References: Batman & Walgreens Pharmacy. Successes: BatCondom & WalBreastAugmentation
slstickney
slstickney@ecwpress Dear Sirs: I am required to periodically apply for jobs in order to receive unemployment. Please do not hire me. Resume enclosed.
eugaet
eugaet@ecwpress Don't know if mine was against the rules, as instead of 1 reply it was a comedy-tragedy in 5 acts...um, I mean tweets...
David Barker
nouspique@ecwpress @untoward Dear Sirs, won't be submitting to yr contest as I've already read Overqualified. Loved it. Sadly, bought at Pages. Sigh.
Jack Kenneth
JackKenneth@ecwpress Need a job? Make cash at home typing ads for companies. Work PT/FT and earn $100s weekly. http://bit.ly/kEK7Y
eugaet
eugaet@ecwpress Dear Hiring Manager for Twitter, You can take your 140 characters and sod off. Why you would require applicants to su...NINE HELLS
@PosterchildPITH: @ecwpress Dear Samsonite Luggage, My Brother died and I need a job. Please find my resume enclosed. Joey Comeau.
Eric Vondran
nscafe@ecwpress HR Manager;I'm a creative if but restrained writer. Please see my website for further examples of my writing: http://bit.ly/P6qQI
Noah Rodriguez
noahremainsanon@ecwpress Hello, I am required by law to inform you that I am a registered sex offender. Now, let me tell you what I can offer this company.
eugaet
eugaet@ecwpress Dr Hrng Mngr 4 Twtr, Me = GUI dsgnr. Hv xp w/ wb dsgn&stds & I fl tht I cn ofr Twtr tht wch u r lkng 4. Pls c th flwng rsum...SIGH
eugaet
eugaet@ecwpress Dear Hirng Mnagr 4 Twitr, I apply 4 GUI designr position. Have xperience w/ web dsign & stds & I feel tht I can offer T...SON OF A
Alex Clements
Alexrclements@ecwpress I'm not going to be the most qualified employee you've got, I never finished school, but by fuck, I AM going to be the most naked.
eugaet
eugaet@ecwpress Dear Hiring Managr 4 Twittr, I'm applying 4 position of GUI designer. I have much experience w/ web design & standards & I...CRAP.
Kathryn Oviatt
Valheita@ecwpress Dear Mr. Comeau, I am applying for the soon-to-be-open position of ASW writer. Please relay my condolences to the Comeau family.
Alex Clements
Alexrclements@ecwpress I need a job & I need it for the money. I have a dream, a dream of something magical & beautiful, but kittens & batter aren't free
Jon perry
Grubbyfoot@ecwpress Dear sirs; Employ me and I can guarantee a zero-tolerance stance on the forthcoming zombie apocalypse. Also, I am enthusiastic.
poster child
PosterchildPITH@ecwpress Dear Samsonite Luggage, My Brother died and I need a job. Please find my resume enclosed. Joey Comeau.
EvilJeremy
EvilJeremy@ecwpress To Twitter, The 140 Char. limit is a great idea. As an employee, I'll take it to new mediums, I'd write more, but I'm out of room.
eugaet
eugaet@ecwpress Dear Hiring Manager for Twitter, I am applying for the position of GUI designer. As 140 characters is hardly enough room...DAMMIT.
James Morey
MC_Feste@ecwpress If I may borrow a permanent marker, I would like to correct the errors in your help wanted sign. I ask no pay but your shame.
paulcarpenter
paulcarpenter@ecwpress Hi, this is my cover letter: if you give me a job then I will give you a kiss on the face. Can't say fairer than that can you now?
Allie Riley
skinismy@ecwpress I ate my pancakes this morning thinking "Is there nothing better than J. Comeau?" the answer? ECW press. And wombats.
I very want one. Excited to get my copy once I have the job to pay for it. Hmm...
haha... so i'm not the only one here..
Romania is the ass of the world, you're right. Have a nice day.
I have already read it and I'm from (apparently) the ass of the world (or Balkans). So where is a will there is a way. Good luck my friend and remember that we all need an ass once in a while ;)
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awesome!